Shooting For a Short Post

Today I woke at 8:40 and wished I could just go back to sleep. I really could have but I kept feeling like I had to get up. I did so and just played on my computer for a good portion of the morning. I then also, as usual, played Pokemon Ruby. I did today look up what it would cost to buy the Pokemon version games I didn't have still such as Emerald, LeafGreen and such. To my surprise, all the games I do not have aside from Heart Gold and Soul Silver can be obtained off of eBay for about 5 dollars each. They only come with the cart, most of them, but that's all I really want. I am going to watch these things and decide what I want to buy. I can only make three purchases a month without my bank incurring charges but that's good for me as it makes me unable to go nuts with my money.

Unlike most weekends, my sis and I did not soon play Tales of Symphonia. I ended up playing Pokemon Ruby up until we went to the store to get groceries for the most part then while I waited for my sister and my mom to put on these fake nails they bought I played more Pokemon Ruby. It wasn't until around 3 in the afternoon that we started playing. It's all good though, although starting late meant we had to find something else to do rather than try Neiflheim. We have learned our lesson not to get into that unless we start early in the morning.

We played until supper was ready, we had Great Value brand chicken nuggets and some mac and cheese. It was actually really good and I loved it. We had plenty of leftovers so we all may have lunch for tomorrow, aside from my sis whom will likely eat whatever the school serves. When we were done my sis and I returned to Symphonia and worked on getting Genis the "Little Chef" title. It took a lot less time than we expected. The longest part was searching for purple Satay. It was especially long as we mistakingly went to Mizuho in search of food and ended up having to challenge Kuchinawa. Deciding that since we didn't save and we did not want to redo any of Genis's recipe mastery, we thought we would just let Kuchinawa whoop Sheena. This plan of course was tossed aside when Sheena went into Overlimit the instant we entered battle.

I was not about to sit around and not take advantage of Overlimit. Whether I would win or not, I summoned Maxwell to do some damage. I then also decided that I didn't want to waste a summon so I went ahead and tried to win. Worst that could happen was I lose as we had originally planned to do anyway. To my surprise, I actually won. This was very shocking because the last time I won, also the first time, I tried over and over to beat him and couldn't do it until I used a summon but I was also level 100. This time however, I was only level 80. Although I would not have come close to winning had I not had the ability to summon.

After my miraculous win and starting the random Volt skit, we continued our search for Purple Satay. Since it was close to 10 I just searched online on where to find it. Go figure it was the Katz village right near Iselia where we were fighting monsters so the battles would be quick so we could cook. We went to Katz, got the Purple Satay and finished things off and got his title. I was glad to turn it off though as I had been tired of playing it for awhile already. At least tonight I will be done with my post before 1 in the morning my time. I had actually posted a temp post when I started last night so I would ensure to get it posted on the day that I wanted it as backdating is much more effort than making a quick temp post then editing the post with what I want to say.

Anywho, that about does it for today. So glad this was much shorter today. I'm just not in the mood to write a long post. Anyway, goodnight!

Strategies Against Seles

Today was a very good day. I woke at 8:40 and played on my computer and Pokemon Ruby for a good portion of the morning. I was surprised while playing Pokemon Ruby as I happened upon a shiny Pokemon. I was pretty shocked as I have never found a shiny on Pokemon Ruby before nor have I caught one without a device since the second generation of games. Okay sure, you don't have to believe me and I'm sure you don't, just keep in mind that nothing that is said can change the truth, so there's no purpose in lying, plus I know it's true so that's all that matters. It was a Shiny Spoink so it wasn't a Pokemon I particularly cared about but I caught it anyway as I was just happy to have caught a purely legit shiny. I don't even know if half the shinies I've managed to trade for are real but I at least know this one is.

Shortly after catching that shiny Pokemon and training my Sawblu a bit I went to get me some breakfast, shortly after which my sister woke up. After we both ate we started up on playing Tales of Symphonia. We were ready this time to venture into Neiflheim to train our characters to level 80 so that I could get my character, Presea's, Gaia Cleaver. We planned that after we accomplished that I would use it to defeat Seles to get the Last Fencer for my sister's character, Zelos.

Well, needless to say, the path to level 80 was definitely not easy. Sure we only had 5 levels to go but with crappy experience from all possible monsters aside from the few bosses left, that isn't easy to do and is way time consuming. We used Neiflheim as we believe the experience is somewhat highest here, plus, we are trapped in there until we do one of three things:

1. Beat the entire dungeon, which we had no intention of doing as we wanted to just use it for training, plus we knew we weren't strong enough to take it down yet.

2. Find a large green flame on one of the many ignitable candlesticks throughout the dungeon. This being our favored choice as if we were lucky, we wouldn't have to fight the mini-boss nor worry about having to beat the entire thing which we had little to worry about with that as we took actions to make sure we never had enough soul fire to do that till we were ready to beat the dungeon.

Then there's the third option. Die. Definitely not a convenient choice as this option would mean redoing any and all training we had done before then since saving.

So yeah, we were careful never to take the third option and training was tough. Many times we got away with exiting the dungeon before the end of floor 10 in which we would have to fight the first boss, the Hell Knight. One time we were not so lucky and had to fight him. We used an all-divide on him and it made him a piece of cake to fight. This was good as he would have slaughtered us otherwise. We got out of the battle with little trouble and even leveled up. Shorlty after beating him, we found a large green flame and was allowed to exit the dungeon. As we always do upon leaving that place, I saved like crazy. I saved before using the inn, after using the inn, then after purchasing replacement items. And sometimes once more after that.

We did try going to Mitho's castle to train a bit but we discovered since we were at level 78 and needed about 15k just to level up and the fights there gave us 400-600 exp at best, this was not the best choice. So back to Neiflheim we went. This would have gone better had we had some Demon Seals on us all so we would get 100% more experience, but my sis and I decided that they were so convoluted to get, that by the time we would finally get those, we'd be level 80. This time in Neiflheim, we decided not to fight random monsters unless we were forced to fight all monsters on a floor to move to the next floor. We had several of these actually but it was good as it seemed to have either leveled us up to 79 or nearly did. We were aiming to fight the Hell Knight. Neither me nor my sister were confident we could fight it and beat it without an all-divide but we had to try. We had only one all-divide left but we were saving it for Abyssion if we ended up needing it when we got ready to fight him.

Without the all-divide this fight was fiercely different. Only about 10-20 seconds into the battle we began to be killed off very quickly. So quickly I had to abandon playing Presea, my usual character and play my secondary character, Raine. Luckily I had figured out how to switch the character I am playing in the middle of the battle else we would have been up shit creek without a paddle. We nearly were as it was. When I started playing Raine it wasn't so bad, I even had time to use Field Barrier and Acuteness without having to worry about using Revitalize too quickly. However shortly after that the battle took a turn for the worse and the Hell Knight kept slaughtering us. At first I used Life Bottles to take care of bringing people back but we started to run out quickly. I equipped Raine's Resurrection to a button command and used it myself, I wasn't about to allow Raine to be computer controlled again for that battle, especially not with Resurrection on, she's just not smart enough with that spell, no matter what we set her strategy to.

Using Resurrection was very efficient in reducing the amount of Life Bottles being used but it was still bad and I had to issue Lemon Gels while I waited to use Revitalize. It doesn't take too long to cast but it's long enough that without the use of lemon gels to prevent death while I cast it we would have been smeared. This struggle went on since about the time he was at about 76k. Somehow we managed to keep up the struggle for a long time. We were determined to win as we had A LOT to lose if we didn't beat him. We were lucky and w BARELY scraped by the battle and won. Really, if my sis was not helping me heal with Zelos's Healing Wind and if I had not gotten really good at playing Raine during the first half of the game, we would have been royally screwed. We were also very lucky we managed to have everyone alive at the end of the fight so everyone was able to get experience points. We barely didn't make that though as we only had one life bottle left and I used it to bring Genis back to life just before Presea landed the finishing blow. Even if someone had not been alive at the end, we would have just let it be and use a Demon Seal to get the caught back up.

Both of us were jittery after that fight as we never expected to win although we were determined to. We were freaked out the entire time as we sought out a large green flame to let us out. We were almost unlucky though as on one of the floors we had hit after the fight had left us around 50 soul fire. We bout panicked as we were afraid we would have managed to beat that thing only to die due to loss of soul fire. We were lucky though and managed to get it back up to a comfortable level during the three levels we searched for an exit on. When we finally found the green exit flame we were so overjoyed and ran straight to the Sybak inn to save, sleep, save, buy items then save about 5 times from paranoia.

Sometime in the midst of all this, my mom was so nice and cooked chicken strips in the deep fryer for supper. It was REALLY good and even though it was frozen chicken, it actually looked like real chicken and was very juicy. It is Great Value brand and it only cost 5.20 for the bag and all three of us were able to eat for that price and get full. I am pretty impressed with Great Value products. Well, except their bread, cause it just sucks. But aside from that it's pretty good it seems. My mom also, before this, brought my sister and I a couple small brownies. So sweet of her. =3

Upon viewing our stats we noticed we were level 80 so I was happy in thinking I would now get my Gaia Cleaver. We went to Ozette to get it but after talking to the guy, leaving and going back in, he was gone. I was upset and freaked out. So much so I looked up why this happened. Apparently we had not looked at the scene behind the Vinheim door. Afraid doing so may keep us from getting to fight Abyssion or complete Neiflheim, we were reluctant to save until we view the scene behind the door, then went to Sybak and the Temple of Darkness to make sure both were available. Neiflheim was easy to tell as we just had to click on it then say we didn't want to enter. We were glad it was safe but wanted to check Abyssion too. We got the the Temple of Darkness and found him standing there but just seeing him there was not enough for us so we decided we needed to get into the fight to make sure. We had no plan to defeat him as we feared defeating him would make Neiflheim unplayable so we let him kill us. We were shocked at how long it took him to kill off two fully stationary characters and two poorly defensed spell-casters. Genis survived the longest oddly enough. I guess Hell Knight slaughter makes us think everything else is just slow.

Satisfied, we reloaded the game and plodded back to Mitho's castle to view the door scene again, travel back to Ozette to get the Gaia Cleaver, save, then head off to Meltokio to finally try to face off against Seles. I was actually convinced she'd be easier than Hell Knight. Well, probably is since you have to beat her with one character, but she was no push over. I actually tried several times within an hour or two to beat her and failed. I slaughtered the advanced class but she kept killing me. Of course, every time I fought her I learned something new on what I could do to fight her so almost every fight I got closer to beating her in one war or another. For awhile I just gained strategy pieces which although the loss was annoying, it made it worth it. I got very frustrated however and it began to affect my battles on advanced match. So much so, I would actually let my enemy kill me if my hit points got too low to heal myself to full health with cooking Miso.

I kept losing so many times or I would end up not being able to wing through it with enough health to put me at full health for beating Seles. It really needs to heal you before fighting her since it doesn't allow the use of items. I kept my Extreme Symbol on the entire time but I tried some different secondary items to try to help me. At first I thought borrowing Raine's Faerie Ring would help, then I decided it didn't and tried something else, though I cannot remember what I used. I finally decided I needed the Faerie Ring when I suddenly did very well against Seles but lost just as soon as my tech points ran out. Trying the ring again I went back into it. I did lose several times but I noticed the ring helped as it made it so I could abuse Earthly Protection more often since it didn't cost 46 points to use and was reduced to just 23.

At first I kept trying to use Earthly Protection to guard against not only Freeze Lancer, but also Absolute. I found this was a mistake as I always got hit by Absolute no matter my timing. I also learned soon after that when she casts it, I can just run from the spot and avoid it instead of defending. I found I could do this with all her spells aside from Freeze Lancer as they all either come from the ground, or the sky, while Freeze Lancer has to be defended against as it come from right in front of her and fires horizontally across the screen making it impossible to dodge.

So I learned that while she cast Freeze Lancer, I should defend then against all others I should run up and attack her while she cannot move. I used Endless Infliction at first but it wasn't very effective alone and I kept dying over and over. I finally got so frustrated I decided to get my Ipod and play some music. I tried Manafest first. This helped immensely to calm me down and I felt great. Unfortunately the effect of it wore out quickly and I still became frustrated. Though during my battles with that I learned I could double attack Seles during any spell but Freeze Lancer by using Eternal Devastation, following up with Endless Infliction then running like hell away from her before she was able to hit me.

I kept thinking about her one attack Absolute. Ever since my sister starting singing "Absolute" by Thousand Foot Krutch, my favorite band, that thought always enters my head when I see the spell. Thinking of that I decided to listen to their Album, "Welcome to the Masquerade". It was incredible how much happier I felt listening to that and I calmed immediately. My advanced match fights became cake since I was so relaxed and having fun. I was overjoyed when I realized I actually managed to beat the Dragon Knight at the end and have enough hitpoints that I could heal to full health and tech points for my battle with Seles. I knew it would make a difference as many times I nearly beat her with about 3300 hit points and my full health was 5301.

For the battle against Seles I was set on listening to my favorite TFK song, E for Extinction. I started the song then started the battle. It was crazy how fluid the battle felt when I was pumped up to that song. I really felt like I was dealing the whipping instead of me being the one with their ass being handed to them. Now I did end up getting fairly low on HP but I managed to fairly easily avoid Absolute and block Freeze Lancer while using Eternal Devastation followed by Endless Infliction. After I knocked her hat off her head, I also easily avoided her Mini Meteor and her other attacks as well as avoided her added spells, Ray, and Prism Sword. As I said, even though I did end up with around 900 hitpoints I managed to beat Seles fairly easily, or so it felt. Go figure I manage to beat her the first time listening to my favorite TFK song while fighting. I was so happy when I finally won and had wished my sister could have been there to see that she now had her weapon, although I have to wonder if I would have been able to win had I not been being watched and therefore able to just have fun without comments about how weird I'm acting because I seriously think that being happy and just having fun because of the songs really helped a lot in winning.

I was tempted to try to get Raine's best weapon while I was up though I felt that even though I won, I was still nerve-wracked and trying that that lat at night would not have been easy and rather frustrating. So I just gave Raine her Faerie Ring back and equipped Zelos with his new weapon so it will be ready for use tomorrow. One reason I was determined to get that done tonight was my sis had gone to bed around 9 and told me I could keep trying for it even though she wouldn't be there and I didn't want to be taking up however long to beat her and leaving my sis unable to play for awhile. She knew she couldn't beat it herself as most of her character's strength is in spells so casting would be out of the question against Seles and I'm good enough with Presea to whoop through battles solo. It helps though when you have the Ex skill "Savior" and the combo ex skill "Nullify".

Anywho, I saved and turned the game off then packed my stuff up to come in here and write this god-awful long post. I know most of you, if any of you would really not care a lick about any of this I'm writing but I found it most fun and would like to remember it again sometime. I probably left out some details but I believe I got the majority of them and I'm not about to re-read this post to see if I forgot anything from my day. I didn't mention it earlier, but I also randomly got a friend request on Facebook from an old friend from school whom I have grown indifferent towards. I am not too sure what to make of the request but I accepted it as I do not want to hurt her feelings. I'm just not that kind of person. I'm just not sure why she's suddenly FRing me after all this time. Whatever. We'll see what happens.

Anywho, aside from standing around and talking to my mom about three fourths into this post, I have little more to write here. I'm sure any of you still reading is thinking "THANK YOU" right about now as I wrote on and on about nothing anyone but I would care about. Hahahaha, I think this is definitely my longest post yet. I pray never to beat it. It's taken me about an hour and forty five minutes just to write this all. So yeah, I'm going to wrap this up here, grab my Pokemon Ruby, and head off to bed before all my fingers break off.

Night! @.@

Am I Really That Short?

Today was pretty good I think. My mom woke me at 5:30 to ask where the canned cat food was. I told her and went back to sleep as I saw no reason to get on up an hour early. When I got up at my normal time I went about my business, getting my stuff together and getting me some breakfast so I wouldn't be dying of starvation come lunch time. We headed to work early as my mom didn't feel like waiting the extra time plus it gave us some time to get gas in the van before work.

As usual I didn't do much aside from play on my computer and play my Pokemon game. For lunch I had the leftovers of the rice from Bonzai Garden that I ate for supper last night. Surprisingly, reheating it in the microwave was just about as good as heating it over the stove-top. I didn't start my vacuuming till nearly 5 as people were still in the office pretty late; I didn't even get time to finish before we had to leave long enough to go to the bank so my mom could deposit a check. My mom took little note of it at first, but the bank actually put out one of those suckers they have for little kids when mom got whatever it was from the transaction. I of course took the sucker from my mom and just looked at it for a moment.

This wasn't the first time I had been mistaken for being a child because of my size and my mom found it quite hilarious. Of course, I'm pretty good natured about it as it happens all the time so I just learn to laugh. I almost always pretend to be insulted, in such a way everyone knows I'm not truly insulted, but I always laugh about it. Especially later. I guess being 4' 11' and 21 years of age will throw lots of people off. I just can't wait till I'm driving alone and a cop pulls me over cause I look under-aged. That'll be great fun cause I'll have my driver's license with me as proof I'm legal. =D

We ended up going back to the office quickly then leaving again as I had forgotten my purse so I could authorize my mom depositing a check to me into her account. Before we did this though we went by my grandma's house to pick up a check from my dad to my mom. We were almost late to the bank before it closes because my grandma would not shut up even though we told her we needed to go so we could get to the bank. She just doesn't understand unless it benefits her. Sounds like someone else I know, and it isn't my mom. *cough*Lindsay*cough* Turns out, when we got to the other bank, I didn't even need my driver's license seeing as we had done this several times already. Ah well.

We had already decided we would not go to group since we would have Sarah over. Unfortunately, plans changed and she wasn't going to come over. I had a feeling that would happen if I got excited. I almost never get excited cause most of the time when I do it never happens but I let it happen again and I was disappointed. I had actually learned about this at lunch so I was pretty upset for a majority of the day till the incident with the sucker at the bank. Thing like that just can't leave you gloomy. And the sucker was pretty good too. Lime flavoured.

After that we headed to the Dollar Tree to pick up some canned cat food for one of our cats, Hallow, as he had not been doing well recently and we were using it to help gain him some weight and it has been working really well. While we were there I looked around for a laundry basket for myself. I found one I felt would work but my mom didn't want to get it because she didn't want to get me something if it was a "just for now" thing. Seriously, the thing was only 1 dollar so I don't understand what the deal was. I really need a basket of some sort as I am tired of piling my clothes on my closet floor then trying to carry the entire load in my arms to the washer every Wednesday when I do my laundry. She did say she would buy me a better one at Family Dollar sometime later although at Family Dollar everything is just cheaper, not 1 dollar like at Dollar Tree. At Dollar Tree I had also spotted a paddle ball toy that featured the Naurto characters Naruto and Gaara. I thought of Leighanna immediately because it was Naruto, plus, it had her favorite character Gaara. Unfortunately I was not intelligent at the time to think to buy it for her. If it is still there the next time my mom and I go there, I am going to buy it for her.

We finally headed on home after that. We didn't find birdseed at the Dollar Tree so my mom decided she would likely get that on Monday. I was about starving when I got home so after I got all my stuff set back up how it needed to be I went to fix me a mini pizza. I ate that with ranch dressing and a Mountain Dew. At first I didn't think I would finish it as I had been drinking the little half cans of Mountain Dew and my mom just recently decided to buy me the full size cans as they were a better deal. Oddly enough, after my sis and I sat down to play Tales of Symphonia, I did end up finishing it off. I was glad as it would have ended up flat by the time I would have wanted it again as I am not a heavy soda drinker and just 3 cans can likely last me a few weeks, so an entire box will take me a month, maybe a month and a half to get through.

On the game Leighanna and I went through Mithos's castle to get the Present, Past and Sacred Stones so we could do the Neiflheim quest. We got in there with the sole intention of doing training only and we planned to escape the dungeon on the first large, green, exit candlestick that we found. Unfortunately we did not find one and ended up dying when I mistakenly chose the option "Select a character and fight" and was unable to choose Presea as I had chosen her the last time that option came up. I chose Lloyd as Leighana and I can both play him. Unfortunately the level also chose to make us fight all monsters and I was quickly killed off by the demons and forced to load from our last save which was right before we entered as there are no save points within the nasty long dungeon. This was rather frustrating mainly because we had gained a couple of levels within the dungeon so all our progress had been erased in that regard. We were too tired to continue and decided it was best never to go into that dungeon for any reason too late at night. Being already fairly late, we decided to give up on the game for the night and turn it off. We will likely try again tomorrow when neither of us are tired.

I was fine with leaving the game, I was wanting to go do my own thing anyway about halfway through our play tonight. I started playing on some of the sites I like then I decided to get out my zen garden I bought and set it up. I took about 10 minutes to play with it before I got it where I think I like it. I don't know if I will change it again anytime soon but at least if I get bored of it's current design I can easily change it any way I choose. I really like the little thing, it's pretty cool and I had always kinda wanted one. Of course, I'm just fascinated with almost anything oriental.

Well I think that just about sums up my day. Pretty good day I think. I'm just happy I didn't have to go to group as I seriously didn't feel like going today and neither did my mom. Anywho, I think I'm going to wrap things up here, play a little more on my comp, then shove off and play my Pokemon Ruby awhile before I go on to bed. Cya!

PS. In case you guys are wondering, I tried to fall asleep to a movie the night before last. Yes I actually tried! But by the time I got the movie in, I felt pretty awake and even after settling down and watching Pokemon Jirachi: Wish Maker, no matter how tired I kinda felt, I just was unable to fall asleep till after it ended and I put the movie away. I officially fail.

When Life Crumbles

Today was a fairly nice day.. Till tonight that is.. It seems every time I get something nice, or something good happens to me, something horrible happens in the same day to make me cry. It never fails.

Today seemed like any other. Playing on the computer and my Nintendo DS. Although as soon as my sis got home, things were different as she did not ask to play the game. I think though it was because she wanted to watch The Chronicles of Riddick which we had rented from Netflix and not yet watched it. It didn't bother me though. She has every right not to play and I had other ways to entertain myself.

My mom texted me before my sis had even gotten home telling me she had a surprise for me and asked that I not let her forget when she said she was on her way. Luckily I did not have to remind her as Leighanna was talking to her as she left so she remembered. I was really happy as she had brought home some chicken and rice from Bonzai Garden, my favorite restaurant in town. I didn't eat all of it so it meant I could have the rest for lunch tomorrow. After I ate, we went to watch the Chronicles of Riddick. It was a good movie, though I really couldn't grasp most of the plot.

After that I returned to my room, content to play on my computer and play Pokemon. My mom came to my room to tell me a warning about something with Farmville and I took care if making sure it didn't affect me. Though none of these things is what I title this post after. No it is really what came after when my mom spoke with my dad. I do not want to get into the details here in case there are those outside the family reading, but in the end it seems my parents may be forced to devorce. If my mom is reading she will likely be upset I even wrote that much but I am rather upset right now and I need to talk it out here whether there is anyone reading these writings or not. Not that I will ever have any trouble remembering this bitter event. Now it's not a given that this will happen but things do not seem to be improving and she keeps mentioning that even though she very much does not want to, and I believe her, that she may not have any other choice than to do so.

Honestly, for so long I had prided myself that I was a child of parents still together as many people I knew had divorced parents and I knew that even though my parents fought sometimes, they always reassured me divorce would never happen. I do not think of them as liars for this as I do not think my mom could have ever predicted such an outcome as she never desired it and I do not think of her any less. I may be stupid for having prided myself on something like that but it made me feel good. Even all this time that this rift has been here since November I have acted in such a way that I was bothered very little about it all. I think it is because any time my parents fought, they always resolved the issue and no harm was ever done. And so even though this time was vastly different, my heart still held the hope that things would mend in time. I am certain that I felt bothered because I was confident God would fix this. If things do not mend, I will of course not be angry with God though I will be sad that he chose to let it happen, but I will not think of him any less as I'm sure whatever he chooses to happen will be for the better.. For someone at least. I just hope things will turn around soon as I am finally starting to lose hope.

I officially apologize to my mother if she so happens to read this and is upset by my doing so but I felt the need to write it here as I consider this place more like a diary than a journal, despite that it is public although if I find the need to change the nature of this blog then I may just do so. Please do not get me wrong by anything written here. I love my mother very much and nothing mentioned here makes me think any less of her. I just wish things could be better.. But after events of this magnitude, nothing could ever be the same again. This is the longest I've ever been without my dad around and I have gotten used to it. Not that I like it but because of his absence I have become fearful of his presence, so even if he did come back, I would likely be uncomfortable for a time. Although I do very much wish him to return, for my mother's sake.

I feel recently like my life is completely falling apart now. Perhaps that is why I have buried myself in my machines where I can keep myself in a place far from reality and kept so busy I don't have to think about reality. I understand this is not healthy but I've never been exposed to this amount of stress before and it's all I can do to cope with the pain. Hey, it's better than going out and doing drugs or something right? Lots better. Right now I'll be crying over this, but surely by tomorrow it will recede from my mind and my tears will dry. It seems I am only affected by this saddness when my mom mentions something about the possiblity of divorce. I guess because my mind rejects the idea and it only seems a reality when it is currently or recently being discussed. I cannot imagine things getting much worse than they are now. I guess I shouldn't really say that as they just might get worse. It's these kinds of things that sap my will do to anything constructive and makes me retreat within a mental shield. I just cannot handle how my life has changed. It is far from desirable but I do not wish to die to get away from it and I surely could not bring myself to do myself in. That is a good thing though as it means I am ensured I am not a danger to my well being.

Anyway. I think I'm going to go now. It's surprising how much I can end up typing when I'm in such a somber mood and am not content enough to complain about writing my blog and thus writing it up as short as possible so I can get on with something else. I am only leaving now as I have little to nothing left to say nor do I have the desire to mull it over much longer. I'd like to bury myself in fantasy now and try not to think of the horrible inevitable.

Good night all. Hopefully next time I will have a bit more cheery day to write about. For both of our sakes.

I'm Not So Useless After All (At Last Not Today)

Today I completely forgot it was Wednesday. I played on my comp and my Pokemon Ruby for awhile today until I finally got up to clean my Lucky Bamboo. It had been a little too long since I last did this and I could tell it was in need of it. I took it to the bathroom so I could gently wash it's roots and clean the gravel it is kept in. Cleaning the gravel was much easier than normal since we got some strainers for the sink drains. I think the plant should be plenty happy now. I actually got on Skype today and talked to Tyler there for a good majority of the day.

After that I was in a complete cleaning mood so I did my laundry, put away the dry dishes, washed the ones in the sink and cleaned off the counters. I even cleaned the toaster as it was a total nightmare. There were Pop-tart crumbs ALL in it. Luckily the tray comes off sorta and I got it clean for the most part. I didn't get everything I wanted to get done but I got a good bit. Amongst all this I had forgotten to feed the animals and I had even gone back to playing on my computer before I finally remembered only minutes before my mom was to get home. My mom seemed happy and surprised about what I had gotten done and I was just happy to have made her happy. It turns out that it was good I did the extra cleaning because Leighanna's friend Chris came over for a short while so she could give him the dream-catcher she made him for his birthday. She was very happy that he liked it.

When I got back to my room Leighanna asked me to put some videos from Night of The Claw on Lindsay's flashdrive. She was afraid to ask at first as she assumed it would take a long time. I knew it wouldn't so I started that immediately. It did take awhile though as my desktop will not recognize Sandisk cruzers so I had to put the files on my PNY then transfer them to my laptop, then to the cruzer as my laptop will recognize them. I ended up missing one of the files and had to find it on my desktop then retrieve it. I got that all done while she and I talked about various things.

Throughout this time I kept searching for something to eat but I had only managed to eat a small bag of crunchy Cheetos before my mom and sis had gotten home earlier. I kept getting distracted by my comp and my sis telling things to my mom and such. I did end up eating when I got really weak and sick feeling so I just heated up poptarts and got me a glass of milk. I feel much much better now.

Anywho, I know my post are getting so wimpy. I just don't have the will to type the amount of detail that I used to. There's really little point in it. Anyway, I'm going to wrap up here then go lay down with my Pokemon Ruby game and possibly watch Pokemon Jirachi: Wish Maker. I know I always say I will but I don't. And more than likely I still won't. Heh. Night all.

Texas Ninja Guard Snowman

This morning I was waked early by my sister. She was excited about the snowfall this morning and couldn't stand waiting any longer. She seemed to have disliked getting me up because she didn't ant to disturb me but I wasn't bothered by it, at least not for snow. After I got a good look at the snow I was going to go on back to bed but something happened with my foot and due to me having to put extra effort into moving around I was more than awake enough to stay up.

Leighanna an I were not quite ready to go outside and play so I took some time to finish things up on my computer before going to play Symphonia with her some more. We did that for a couple hours then we turned it off and got ready to go outside. I took my camera with me as I was not about to pass up the opportunity to get pictures of all the snow. I did little more than take pictures while I was outside but I was very happy doing so. Unfortunately, my fingers began to hurt as my gloves are only half-finger an it was very hard to operate my camera with my gloves in mitten-mode.

We went inside and returned to playing Symphonia for a little longer while we warmed up and let our gloves dry. We had Strogonoff for lunch an some Peanut-Butter cup brownies for snack. It was really good and the brownies were nice and soft an sorta gooey. Before long we were back outside as it had snowed even more and seemed to have erase everything we had done in our last visit. This time I was wearing some miss-matched loves of hers as they had fingers which allowed me better usage of my camera while she used my glove as the mitten feature didn't bother what she wanted to do. We also decided to build a snowman. This one didn't end up like your average snowman. My sis and I got a little carried away and made it a ninja snowman. He ended up rather creepy looking so I gave him a frown and my sister called it a Texas Ninja Guard Snowman. We laughed about this for some time after and we even took pictures of ourselves next to it. It was by no means well made but it was fun all the same. We had not made a snowman in a number of years due to the scarceness of snow an especially of the amount required to build one of a fair enough size.

When we went inside we let our gloves dry again while we got some hot-chocolate. My sis and I put cool-whip in ours which was good. I enjoyed mine but I drank too much an made myself a little sick as it was pretty sweet. We let ourselves rest and warm up then went to the backyard to play with the dogs as when we were out front Blanco, one of our three dogs looked determined to get outside to play with us.

We only allowed Blanco and Raya out to play as Li was so small he'd end up with icicles on him like he did this morning before mom gave him a nice warm bath. Blanco really seemed to enjoy playing and I got some cute pics and videos. We didn't stay out there long and I was able to go inside and stay there the rest of the day. I did enjoy Tyler's company throughout the day up until returning to the game after playing with the dogs.

My sis and I continued Symphonia up until a little after 8 as we could not think of anything else we could accomplish before 9 so we just turned it off. It was fine with me as it gave me the time to come in here and type my post without procrastinating on it and trying to do it the next day when I would not remember so many details as I would tonight. During the time we were playing before 9, we had some turkey cheese melt things my mom made with slice turkey sandwich meat. I'd never had that before but it was REALLY goo and I enjoyed it. I was very gla mom made it.

I'm sure there are still some other details I would like to record here but I cannot think of them and I'm really too tired to go on about this much longer.

Anywho, I think I'll just play on my comp for a couple hours more if I last so long then hea to be. Night!

Pokemon Ruby

Today I actually spent alot less time on my computer than I usually do. I did spend a good while on Farmville doing various things and I clicked very little on GPX. My sis got home at her usual time and I was actually looking forward to it a bit since I was kinda bored aside from the fact I had randomly decided to restart Pokemon Ruby version. I don't know why, but Pokemon always seems to be fun, no matter what version it is, although I do enjoy the first two generations the best. My sis and I did end up playing Symphonia for a couple of hours. She wanted to go to something at school so we didn't get to play long. It was okay though as I'm pretty into playing Pokemon Ruby.

I let her borrow my digital camera I had gotten for Christmas and I was happy that she treated it well. Honestly I was a little worried, not that I didn't trust my sister but because it's still very new and in great condition although since she brought my camera back to me in the same condition I lent it to her I will likely not worry so much about her borrowing it in the future.

Although I was into it, I did go and visit my mom most of the evening, all while playing Pokemon. She didn't seem to mind and I was glad that she enjoyed having me in there. She wasn't feeling well so I definitely wanted to be in there with her to make her feel better although I do need to start visiting her more often and I'm not too sure why I don't since I like being around her.

As for the past couple of hours since she went to bed I played with Farmville and clicked a few people's Pokemon on GPX all while playing Pokemon Ruby, I'm completely re-addicted to that game.

Anywho, I'm going to go back to my game then head to bed. Night!

Stupid Pizza Cutter

Today I got up and did my usual. I played on my comp while waiting for when my sis would be ready to play. She came into my room and chatted with me a bit while I got finished up though we only played a short while today as she planned to go to the store with my mom to pick up some beads for a dream-catcher she was making. They also went grocery shopping.

While they were gone I discovered Greasemonkey and a cool script for the pokemon site I've been playing. Apparently the admins are fine with it as the script was posted in plain site on the forums and such. It's not really a cheat though so I can see why they left it alone. It just helps by making some things a little easier to do such as clicking but it doesn't do that for you. Still gotta do the clicking myself. It has some other cool features too. I found a few other cool scripts as well that I downloaded and installed.

I felt bad when my mom and sis got back as they had bought some things for me. I felt bad because I had made a light complaint to my sister about her getting some special things and I felt left out, but I felt bad about getting something after having done so, which thus, made them upset because I didn't act very excited and I feel bad for killing their mood because they were just trying to do something nice for me. I did apologize but I feel it did not completely make them feel better. I don't expect it either, really.

I felt pretty sad after that, not just for what had happened but also because I was left all alone. Usually I like that but I guess I've gotten so used to playing with my sis almost all day that not doing so and left by myself made me feel a bit neglected. I know I could have easily gone and talked to my mom and sis but for some reason I felt like I shouldn't. I definitely didn't wanna get in the way of my mom's time with my sis so I just sat in my room and mindlessly clicked on Pokemon.

I ate one of the small, personal pizzas that my sis picked out for me at the store. She got them for me so I would have something quick and easy to cook on weekends, weekdays before she and mom got home, or any other time when they were making something for themselves and I needed to fend for myself. I'm sure no one really cares about that though. I tried to use a pizza cutter to cut it but I had a hard time finding it. My sis thought it was funny as every time I looked somewhere and couldn't find it I said "stupid pizza cutter". She told me she was going to call someone that sometime. Knowing her, she probably will.

I'm feeling a bit less lonely, but I think it's because I found some things to do to take my mind off of it. I think tonight I might finally get around to trying to watch a movie till I fall asleep but I dunno if I will manage it. I'll try. I might also play the Wii a bit before then but I doubt it.

Wow.. For all that happened today that sure is a short post. Oh well, night all!

More Symphonia

Heh, today has very little interesting events to tell. Really, it probably has none. I played on my comp till about noon then played Symphonia with my sis till 12 midnight. Wow I have no life. I need to find something more to type about on weekends. More importantly, I need to find more interesting things to do or accomplish because this is becoming pathetic. Well.. Surely I'll have more to talk about tomorrow.

Night!

Bitter Friday

I woke today on my own. Normally I would just rest until my mom came in to wake me but when I saw the clock it was close to 6:40 AM already. I waited till 40 but I grew a bit concerned when my mom did not come in to wake me. Unable to rest after that, I got on up and went to her room. She was surprised to see me already up and told me she would have woken me at 6:45 AM.

We got to work and I immediately wanted to get vacuuming out of the way but I couldn't until after 10:30. Luckily, I didn't have to worry about getting into too much before then as I had to go with my mom to some medicaide meeting thing so she could get that set up. It seemed to take forever just waiting. I would have been fine waiting so long except there was another person there and they were chewing gum and I unfortunately could hear it. Bad thing with gum chewing, once I hear it, I can't ignore it and it's beyond irritating. I tried to suck it up but I didn't do a very good job as my mom noticed my discomfort but I refrained from making a complaint to her as there was nothing she could do. The other person had every right to chew gum but the sound still rung in my ears for quite some time after that. It was so bad it was like someone was chewing gum right in my ear.

We returned to work but I still could not start vacuuming right away as Tyler, one of the people who work there was still there and would be till 10:30 AM. I played on my computer until 12 as I was unaware that Tyler had left by then. My mom had told me he had but she did it in such a way that I had failed to pick up on it. It was fine anyway, I was hungry and I really wanted to eat before I got to work. Soon after lunch I got the vacuuming done. It was weird not having to worry about that the rest of the day.

Unlike usual, we didn't get anything to eat before going to group. My mom always said we would eat before group so we don't depend on that for food, especially since we're so hungry well before we go. Unfortunately this led to me being overly cranky in addition to not feeling well. I did try, despite what others may thing, to keep from causing a disturbance but it seems in doing so I caused a bigger one. I really do not wish to get into the details of this. Going through it the first time was bad enough and it was entirely my fault. I did finally get a sandwich and my mood immediately brightened.

On the bright side, James was, as always, adorable. I had animal cookies on my plate and he reached up towards me and asked "cookie?". He being so cute I couldn't very well tell him no. I gave him the cookie and his mom had to prompt him to say thank you. He did and he did so very cutely. After he finished it he asked me for another so I gave him one more. He this time said thank you without being prompted. It was too adorable. He ended up asking me for a couple more before I finished them off. I felt bad when he asked for another after that and I couldn't give him one but he didn't seem upset at all by it, thank goodness.

My mom and I talked things over on the way home about what happened tonight. The conversation went fairly well but I still felt like crap for acting like a complete retard. We got home, obviously and I headed right for my room.

Anyway, I'm really tired so I'm going to go to bed early. Night.

Two Days In a Row

Today I had to get up early as my mom and I had to do some conference call thing and it was much easier to have us both there at the time. I'm rather glad as, although at first I was merely annoyed by it, by the end of it I was nerve-wracked. The lady we spoke to I swear didn't sound human. She spoke very mechanically. I was glad when it was over because it meant I could have some coffee. I wanted it before the meeting but I was afraid of it making me sleepy and me either falling asleep just before we needed to call in or me being to sleepy to know what was being said. Either way, it seemed I didn't need to do or say anything.

Aside from forgetting to pack me some breakfast, I didn't do much. After my mom and I ate our packed lunches we went across the street and bought a Reese with 4 cups in it and shared it. I returned to my computer for the remainder of the day just glad I did not have to do cleaning today like I know I will have to tomorrow. Kinda irritating really but it can't be helped. Sometimes we have to do things we don't want to. I had fun with a couple new Pokemon games online. Well one was Pokemon, the other seemed to be a rip off of Pokemon.

I got pretty addicted to the one that was clearly Pokemon as I am still playing it even now, well aside from the instance I am writing this. I was so hooked on the game I didn't even once bother with trying to draw. I very much dislike how much my posts have been really wimpy lately but I really have little to type here. Fridays almost always provide for a healthy post length so let's hope I have a fairly interesting day tomorrow.

Night!

To Get It Done

Today was pretty good. I spent my day playing on GPX Pokedex Plus and putting some basic color on the picture I had done the lineart to yesterday. I got bored of it quickly oddly enough and stopped. I became frustrated as there were many things I wanted to work on but I didn't feel like doing any of those things. Today was different from other Wednesdays as my mom came home and didn't go to church as she was not feeling well. Even after she came home I continued watching Bleach until around 7 when she came to my room asking about what we planned for supper. Honestly I hadn't thought of doing it sooner than 8 for some odd reason despite the fact she was home. I finished watching the episode I was in the middle of then I got up to work on cooking supper. Shelling the shrimp wasn't fun, mostly because it was cold and tedious. We fried it up in a batter we had bought the other day and it turned out really good, especially so with some ranch dressing. We both had plenty to eat and I returned to my room shortly after.

I watched some more bleach but while I did I tried to work on Isaura some more but I am becoming rather stressed with the picture now as it's not turning out well at all. What's worse is I hastily erased a portion of it as I tried to get it to look more like the hollow form and so it distressed me even more, so much so I had to just forget about it. Luckily, playing a bit of Bleach: Shattered Blade helped me to calm down but I am no where close to ready to work on it again before tomorrow. I'd scrap her and just make a new character from scratch but I've written so much information for her I really don't want to start from scratch so I hope that if anything I'll only have to use what I planned to be her hollow form for something else. I still like her hollow form but I don't think it will work with what I want to do with her. We'll just see what happens.

Anywho, I'm really tired, mostly mentally. Until next time. Cya!

A Little Different

Today was pretty general. I did work a great deal on my picture again. This time I worked on the lineart of the Hollow form of my character. I did this and some other things until my sister got home, although when she did we did not play the video game. She was going to soon go to visit a friend who had been hospitalized so she didn't want to get into the game. Although while she waited for another of her friends to pick her up we looked up random anime comics. We found some pretty funny ones.

After she left I continued on by myself just drawing for the most part. For supper we had chicken and cheese rice and it was really good. Of course I almost always enjoy that dish as it is.

Well that's about it. I can't remember much else. I hate it when I can't remember what I did. I really need to stop trying to type these the day after it happened. Night!

Pretty Good Day

Today was good. Almost generic. Though there were some differences. I worked on my picture of my Bleach character today. Really I worked on a new sketch of one of her forms. I'm pretty happy with it. Maybe I'll color it tomorrow if I feel up to it. For lunch I couldn't find anything to eat at first. I wanted hot dogs but we didn't have any bread and I didn't want ramen. I ended up cooking the shrimp I had defrosted for supper on wednesday. I wanted to eat it before it went bad as it had been defrosted for awhile now. I didn't do anything special with it. I just cooked it up like I would if I were making scampi but without the noodles and green onions, and I only used one clove of garlic. It turned out well so I was happy though it didn't fill me up. I dealt with it and returned to working on my drawing.

As of yesterday I got back into playing GPX Pokdex Plus. It's a rather fun site.. I don't really know why clicking a bunch of Pokemon is so addicting but it is. My sis and I played more Tales of Symphonia. It doesn't matter how many times we play that, that game will remain infinitely fun. We did that up until a little before 9 then I came in here, played more on GPX and started this post. Now, I am going to wrap it up as there is little more to be said that has even a remote amount of importance. Not that anything said here is important to begin with.

Anywho, gonna return to playing then head to bed. Night!

Clone Day

I don't even know why I'm writing a post for today. Really it was the same as many others. I hate to say it but I think this will be my shortest post as I cannot recall a single thing exclusive to today from any other. Eh, until next time I guess. Cya!

Just A Saturday

There's really not much to tell about today really. When I got up I played on my comp some then shortly after ate breakfast. We had French Toast this morning. I was happy because I really love French Toast. After, I almost immediately went to playing Tales of Symphonia with my sis. We had fun though I was unable to find anything to make a comic out of. Though that is fine seeing as I have plenty of ideas, like 4, right now and it'll be awhile before they are all done. Plus, that's not the reason I'm playing that anyway. It's just a nice bonus when I can find something to make a comic about.

About mid-day I took a short break to take care of my Farmville crops. Sometime later after I returned to the game my mom decided she wanted to clear off that shelf she planned to let me put in my room. Since she was doing that I decided to get up and clear off the breakables from the small shelf that was going to have to move so I could put the bigger one there. I never did this before because I had nowhere to put the misc items except on my bed but I needed to keep my bed clear at least until the day my mom wanted to get that done.

My mom took the smaller shelf to put where the big one used to be and she placed the big one against my wall. When Leighanna and I finished playing the game I took the time to put all my things on the shelf and arrange them nicely. Of course, I kinda have to do that. Else I'd have to sleep on the floor.

Anywho. It's already pretty late now so I'm heading off to bed. Cya!

Valentine's Party

Well today was like any other to start with. I woke feeling like I really didn't want to be, though once I got up I didn't feel sleepy or too opposed to being up. Last night I had got all my stuff that I planned to take with me all together so I didn't have to worry about it now. Although in doing this it meant I had free time to do what I wanted, though I don't feel like doing much when I'd be leaving in only 30-40 min. I did play on my computer for awhile before I packed it up and left with my mom.

Before we got to the office, my mom took us by the Trans Texas bank and she bought us each a heart-shaped Valentine's cookie. It was really cool because 100% of the proceeds go to Relay For Life. I still haven't eaten mine. I was going to but around lunch I didn't want it then I felt too full or kinda sick to eat it. Plus, my mom hasn't eaten hers either pretty much for the same reasons.

While I was there I didn't watch Bleach and I didn't take my picture of my chracter I'd been working on. I felt like I needed a break. Besides, one of the pictures relating to her that I drew was on my desktop and there was no point putting it on my laptop since I don't do art well on my laptop. Plus, I don't have anything but MS paint on my laptop so I would have only been able to finish the sketch. And I know I can put art programs on my laptop, but I just prefer not to double up on programs between my two computers except for staple ones such as Firefox, Mozilla Thunderbird and Skype.

We didn't go and eat anything after we got done cleaning because we were having a Valentine's party at group so we knew we'd have food. Before we went though my mom and I went to my Grandma's house to give her a Birthday card that we had picked out for her during lunch. We stayed longer than either of us expected, or wanted to. My sister decided she had to sit there and just chat away like we had nothing better to do than listen to her talk. I spaced out through most of the conversation as my attention span had all but run out about halfway through it. Though I don't think anyone noticed as I was able to maintain the illusion I was actually paying attention to her as I was still responding.

We finally managed to leave and we headed to group. We got there right on time. I think. It was fun too. There wasn't much to eat that interested me but there was at least some lettuce and carrots so I was content with that. What I waited for the opportunity for was the cheesecake. I saw that and wanted it but I didn't want ot be the first to get into it as I found it rude. My mom kept telling me to go get some so I finally did regardless of being the first one to do so. I got it and sat down. I was happy, I love cheesecake. After I got some though, everyone else started to go in there for some. Seems like I wasn't the only one wanting to wait till someone else got some to get them for themselves.

Shortly after everyone who wanted it got cheesecake, we had a little drawing for some valentines presents on the table on the other side of the room. Instead of numbers however, we drew words. They were words such as "beautiful" "caring" etc. My mom got the one that said "beautiful" and I got the one that said "caring". Mom's present was really cool. It was a little trinket box with a picture of Jesus's face on the top. I was really glad she got it, especially when she told me she'd been putting her jewlery in a white, paper box, so now she has something nice to put them in.

I didn't care much for my gift. It was a wine-glass with broken hearts decorated on it and it said "Love Stinks" on it. I think it's blah. Of course, at things like this, I never like the gift I end up with but it doesn't matter as that's not the point of these things anyway. If my and my mom's gifts were switched, I likely would have traded her so she could have the cool gift anyway. I might still make use of my glass thingy. I could always try to get the words off of it or something. Or perhaps I can ignore it and make use of it all the same.

I helped to clean things up before we left. I have a hard time just standing around doing nothing while others clean up and such, plus, I wanted some of the decorations. Really I just asked if I could keep a few of the little fake petals on the table as I figured they would want to keep the majority but apparently they didn't mind if I took them all and offered. I, of course, couldn't turn that down being the artist I am. I ended up with the heart-shaped sequins too and the plastic table cloth. I didn't even have any interest in that thing but they offered it to me so I figured, why not?

As we talked before leaving, I played with James a little. He was still into pretending to shoot people with this cardboard tube that was approximately twice his height. He seemed really entertained when I would nicely take the tube from him then make little echo-y howling noises through it. I only did this repeatedly because the grin he got on his face and the giggle he made were just too cute.

There was leftover cheesecake after the party so naturally, anyone who wanted any got to take some home with them. Some people did, including me and my mom. We pretty much got every bit that was left from the others taking some with them so we got about six pieces of cheesecake. I definataly was not going to complain about that.

We got home and I put my things away. I'm pretty tired now. I think I'll probably wrap up here and go to bed soon. Night!

Yay For Sisters!

Today was a lot better. I did not ache or feel ill all day. I still don't. I managed to make progress on my Arrancar character, Isaura today while I periodically read comics on Deviantart. I worked on her Hollow form to help with my dillema with her mask. I like how it's turning out but I cannot get the head to work. I was still making some nice progress when my sister came home. Luckily she was not impatient to go play Tales of Symphonia. The first, not the second. She even helped with with some ideas for her clothes since I was having trouble with it. I liked her ideas and I think I can blend all her ideas with those I already had. I did make sure to finish up quickly so we could go play.

Almost as soon as we started playing, we started in with the jokes, as normal. This time was different though as the jokes we made gave me ideas for comics. Odd thing about this is.. I've never made a comic strip in my life. But these jokes were too good to pass up and for once I feel brave enough to try making them. I just hope I do. I ran to get me a notebook and began jotting down the random ideas. I came up with one by myself which I wrote on while we fought. (I was able to since I was playing Raine and I didn't need to heal very often.) I think my sis thought the one I came up with by myself was weird but she was excited about the other two ideas that she helped me come up with. I do agree that those two are far better than mine although I am still going to draw mine too. Just most likely last as I wanna do the more fun ones first. We both had alot of fun coming up with the jist of the situations.

Since I will be at my mom's work tomorrow, I will have all day to start working on one of these comic ideas. I've decided not to bring my pics of Isaura with me so I'm not tempted to work on, and become frustrated by them and I certainly want to work on my comics to see if I can pull them off. Surely I can do fairly well at them. I've got some nice material here I think. Every time I play ToS now though, I will have my notebook with me and ready to jot down any good ideas that strike either one of us. >3

As you can tell, I'm DEFINITELY feeling much better. I wanna stay up a lot later tonight since I feel good and I'm not tired but I gotta get up early tomorrow cause it's Friday so I need to be in bed by 12 which is in.. like.. 19 min.

So this is me, wrapping this up, and heading off to bed! Night!

Yesterday part 2

I'm not going to bother typing much about today. It was practically the same thing as yesterday aside from I felt soo much better. Until evening that is. I felt fine till I left my room right at 8 to go fix fried shrimp. I started to feel only slightly ill at this point so I didn't give it much thought but by the time I was getting ingredients together I felt exhausted. Luckily, my mom called me saying she didn't feel well. Okay well it's not lucky she was sick, that I wish she would feel better. Lucky, only because she called before I started putting things together so I could put things away with no problem and I didn't have to cook which suited me wonderfully as I was not hungry nor did I feel in the mood to cook.

After that I just came back to my room and worked on my Arrancar character and played on my comp. I'm becoming so pained right now it's not even funny. Skin is sensitive and painful and my body aches all over. I even tried watching an episode of Bleach on my desktop computer but I was in so much pain watching it seemed like torture.

Anyway, I'm going to bed. I better be fine in the morning or I will not be happy. Not that I am now... >.>

Night..

Sick Again. I'm Not Used To This.

Today I really didn't do much. I mainly played on my computer and watched Youtube videos. Around 12ish I started feeling dizzy and lightheaded despite being sitting down. I decided it might be too much video watching so I plugged in my Wii and played Bleach a bit. I had my floor fan blowing on me while I played. It felt cold but it made me feel better. For awhile at least. I began feeling sick again so I decided to turn off the game, grab my sketchbook then lay down on my bed to rest. Laying in bed seemed to be the only thing that would help really. I wouldn't feel sick again till I got up for whatever reason. While I layed there I fell asleep. That was good since I probably needed it. When I woke, my mom called me about 30 seconds after. I must have good timing.

I really can't remember much that happened between here and supper time. I was too preoccupied with feeling ill and laying in my bed. Really, this is new to me. I don't get sick that easily and recently I've been, well, mildly sick more often than usual. After telling my mom I was cold, she told me I was running a fever and later confirmed it when she checked. I can't remember the last time I had a fever. It has to have been a couple of years at the least.

Come evening the light-headedness and dizzyness was gone but replaced with almost every inch of my skin being sensitive to the touch, so anytime I moved, or brushed something, it hurt. I also had muscle aches in various places too. Unfortunately, this would not subside just by resting. I visited my mom in her room for a bit but after awhile asked if a bath might help. She said it should and when I asked her if it would bother my sister, whom had already gone to bed, she said it wouldn't. So I went to get me a bath with little guilt knowing I should not bother her in the slightest. The bath did help a bit with the pain and it definitely warmed me up. It made me pretty tired though so I'm going to wrap up here and go right on to bed. Hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow.

Night!

Sick Sis

Woke up early this morning to some weird sound. I got on up just to see what it was but ended up talking to my mom and found my sis was staying home sick. She was sleeping at the time so I chatted with my mom till she went to work. I was going to go back to bed. Tried really but something kept me up. Not sure what to be honest. I decided to play my Wii some and this is what got me wide awake. I tried to turn it on but the red light wasn't showing. I checked the cables and everything was fine, I even tried unplugging and re plugging in the cables. Nothing worked. I then realized I left it plugged in overnight. That's when I got a sinking feeling. I figured that the one time I left it plugged in overnight, that an electrical surge happened and fried it. I looked up possible solutions on the internet, finding only one that might solve the problem and that being to completely unplug the cable from the Wii and outlet for 2 min. I kept searching while I waited in case that didn't work. To my relief, when I plugged it all back up it worked again.

Since my sis was still sleeping after getting my Wii back working I went back to my room to work on some things on my comp as well as working on getting my room into some order. I hadn't worked on it in awhile and thought it was high time to make some significant progress and I succeeded. The only things needing to be done now is to get more posters on my walls, get this one shelf into my room and organize some misc junk. My sis came in a little later and asked if I wanted to play the original Tales of Symphonia. I agreed but I told her I wanted to finish things up in my room first. She was fine with that and shortly after went to lay down awhile. I took longer than expected but it was okay since she ended up talking to a friend on the phone. Around 12 I finally finished and hauled the Wii to my mom's room so we could play. We used the Wii because we felt the Gamecube would be too difficult to get out of the place that we keep it in, plus, I was itching to use the Wii's Gamecube features for the fist time.

We played that for awhile, during which I kept offering to fix my sis something to eat but she refused as she wasn't hungry. It kinda worried me as she hadn't eaten at all. Nothing I could do to make her eat though so I just made sure to entertain her. The game was fun as always and since we know the story so well we were very quick on the jokes based on it and thus even though we've played it around 20 times, we still enjoyed it thoroughly. We even learned something we had never known in all the other times we played. That's one thing. No matter what, we almost always manage to learn something new each time we play.

I cooked Stroganoff for supper because my sister said that sounded good. It took me until a little into House to finish but it ended up okay since the House episode was extra lame. It didn't start anything like usual and it was all surrounded around Kutty. Other people might have loved it, but I only watch House for the "House-ness" and the crazy diagnosis stuff. Not any of the crap concerning Kutty. It was just a lame filler ep. Needless to say I was glad it was over so I could finish playing with Leighanna. She wanted to go to bed early though so we wee done shortly after 9. I don't blame her, she really isn't feeling well. I'm not even sure if she will be going to school tomorrow. If she doesn't I'll surely look after her again.

Up until just a min ago I was on Youtube listening to songs composed on Mario Paint Composer which is an "emulator" designed to well emulate the music composer feature on Mario paint. All the songs were real songs that wee redone on the program. Alot that I heard sounded TOO much like the original so I was actually not impressed with them as it sounded fake. Others, it sounded slightly altered which most people who posted vids like this said they used an altered soundset but I kept the ones like this that did at least sound like the original sounds or the ones I just liked far too much. And to think, I'd have never known about this had Youtube not posted one of these videos on my "Recommended for You" section when I got to the mainpage. Random. But a nice surprise. Playlisting isn't working on my youtube right now so I just saved the links on notepad for the ones I liked and I will playlist them as soon as the feature is working again.

I think I had more to say on this but lately it seems details start to slip my mind as soon as I start typing. In earlier days of my blog I didn't have this problem really.

Anywho. I'm kinda tired. not sure if I will go to bed just yet or if I will play a little Wii before then. I still have to try falling asleep to a movie but I'm not sure I'll get around to it any time soon, or any time at all for that matter.

Anywho, cya!

Wii Tired

After playing on my computer for a short while after I got up today, I spent a lot of time playing Mario Kart Wii. I probably shouldn't have played it so much but since my sis is returning it to Eli tomorrow, I wanted to get as much enjoyment out of it that I could. Apparently I got too much seeing how my shoulder muscles are just killing me right now. Actually, soon after I started playing I felt this way. I really tried to get as much done as I could but there's just so much to complete. I did try the w-fi racing quite a few times. It was rather fun although I almost always got racers who were pretty brutal. The second time I went into it either I was a lot better or my opponents a lot less skilled. My sister thought it was likely both.

Just to keep myself from getting too hurt between races I would lay down for a short while which helped mildly. It was really helpful when my sister finally would want to play so I'd get longer to rest. She didn't feel good today. Seemed to have come down with something. I really hope she feels better soon, she's had such poor luck with her health recently. She helped me a little to unlock some things but for the most part she felt too ill to help. Even though I didn't unlock all the characters, I was happy to have at least unlocked my favorite character, Dry Bones.

For the first time in a pretty long while, we had chicken and cheese rice for supper. It was really good though I had one problem with it. I got full way too fast. *sob* After we finished my mom mentioned wanting to play Mario Kart in a little while. I was happy to hear this as I like playing with her, she's just a lot of fun. While she was getting ready I played some wi-fi races since I could stop those any time I wanted as there is not a set number of races. I was actually surprised at how long my mom was willing to play and she really improved rapidly and she even beat me a couple of times even with my trying my hardest. This and the fact she seemed to really enjoy playing made me really happy. Of course, I was just glad to play the game with my mom, regardless of who won or lost. We played so much we repeated most of the courses several times over.

My sis went to bed around this time and my mom quit sometime after and I took that opportunity to switch games since my shoulders couldn't take much more 'driving'. I played Bleach a bit then my mom asked me if I wanted browines and icecream. We got this without my sister as my mom had mentioned it to her earlier and she didn't like the idea of it since she didn't feel well and we certainly were not about to get it for ourselves then eat it in front of her so we got it after she went to bed so she didn't have to feel left out. I quickly finished up playing Bleach, helped my mom fold my sister's clothes then I headed for my room. I really think I'm going to go to bed soon actually. I'm pretty tired. When I first started typing this my stomach hurt but it doesn't anymore. My mom was worried I might have gotten what my sister had but it doesn't seem to be so since I'm now over it.

Well if I missed anything important I can't think of it. I sure hope I didn't forget anything though. I'd feel sad. Anywho, goodnight.

Exhausted

My mom got me up early this morning. Normally I would sleep later, but I promised her I would help her clean this one building. I definitely had no problem with it. Didn't like getting up but I wanted to help my mom. Especially since she figured it'd take her 4 hours by herself to get it done. I like vacuuming, oddly enough, so I took on that job while my mom took on jobs she was better at than I. I didn't eat breakfast this morning as I was feeling sick yesterday and I wasn't hungry and I didn't want to risk making myself feel ill again. A couple of hours after we got to the building and where cleaning, though, I ended up hungry and asked if pretty soon I could get something to eat. My mom was really nice and decided to go ahead and get something so we went to a convenience store and got me a hot dog for only 86 cents. For such a small price, it was a pretty nice size and it tasted really good.

We went back to cleaning and spent a couple more hours doing that. We had to stop early though. One reason was at 12 we needed to pick up my sister, plus, somehow we wrecked both our vacuums. Our "Rainbow" vacuum seemed to still work a little but the suction was greatly diminished while the other one I think was completely trashed. We didn't discard either machine in hopes they would be okay but my mom thinks the sheet rock dust probably gummed them both up and I have no reason to believe she is incorrect. With both vacuums out of commission we had no choice but to leave the cleaning job unfinished. We finished up everything else we could without vacuums then left to go to the store to pick up groceries. We ended up cleaning for 3 hours and that was with me helping, so just doing what my mom and I did would have taken her alone 6 hours. Throughout cleaning I kept finding random bits of materials and such on the floor that were obviously of no use or value to the construction workers who had been there so I helped myself to picking some of them up such as small broken tiles, unusable pieces of cove base and some strange metal disks and rings. I took these things seeing as they would have been thrown away otherwise and I figured I may make use of them. My mom even helped me to pic up these things.

We got shopping done just before 12 so we didn't have to wait too long to get my sis. We went home and cooked a pizza. My mom was eager to get my dimmer switch fixed so she started throwing breakers so she could replace it without risking shocking herself. We continued doing this not really thinking about what we were doing till it suddenly dawned on me we were throwing breakers and the oven was already cooking the pizza. Oddly, and luckily enough, despite throwing the random breakers, we managed to not once touch the one the oven was on and the pizza got done just as we were finishing up on the switch. The pizza ended up looking burned but it tasted far from it. It was actually really good. When we finished, my sis wanted to play Mario Kart I agreed but mentioned I'd like to play it in mom's room so we could be there in the room with her instead of going off into the living room and leaving her alone. This made her really happy and I'm glad it did. I wanted her to be happy. Plus, doing this allowed her easy access to the game so we could just rotate out and we all got to play that way. It worked well since some of us would be tired and want to rest a bit anyway before tackling another race.

Everyone grew tired quickly so I turned the Wii off and helped my mom make some brownies then went back to the game. Instead of Mario Kart, since no one else wished to play at the time, I played Bleach so I could unlock some characters. My sister ended up getting interested in watching as soon as she heard a character that she didn't realize shared a voice actor with a character on Naruto. I was glad she stayed in there and watched because I liked having her there to talk to. Plus her comments about the characters, no matter what she said, made the game play a lot more interesting and actually rather funny. I made a lot of progress on unlocking characters, managing to unlock, Tosen, and one or two others that I cannot remember aside from Ulquiorra whom was the one I was trying to unlock but I had to unlock a small chain of characters in order to do so. Sadly, he's not very much fun to play, and his voice actor isn't the same. My mom wanted to head to bed so I picked up my stuff and took it to my room so she could. She was very tired. I don't blame her, I was too. I felt about to die when we finished cleaning and I've just been exhausted ever since.

Anywho, I think I'll get off of here soon and finish hooking up my Wii to my TC and play Mario Kart some more. Night!

Sick

Today started like any other Friday. I watched Bleach on my laptop till lunch then ate with my mom some food we had brought with us. I I was feeling pretty ill. The food didn't hut anything but it sure didn't help. Somehow we had gotten on the topic of Bleach even though she doesn't really know anything about it. We still had 30 min left before my mom had to go back to work. My mom, to my surprise, seemed interested in Bleach after having talked about it and wanted to watch an episode if I had one ready on my computer. Luckily I did so I happily started it to playing. She seemed pretty interested in it and even asked me how the situation resolved in the next episode because she was curious and she did not have time for another episode before she had to go back to work.

I watched the next episode and told her what happened. After that, I continued on my own till when I needed to vacuum. I got it done quickly but I was feeling incredibly sick the whole time. For supper my mom and I went to Sonic and I got a breakfast burrito and we shared a large cheese tater-tots. It helped my sick feeling a little but not much.

At group I was pretty bored and really regretted going. I didn't feel well and after eating pizza there I also felt over stuffed so I felt even worse. Plus, I was feeling so cold I had to get my mom's coat from the van. It's not often at all that I'm cold and she's not. At the end of group I had a little fun as while my mom chatted with Stephanie I played with Stephanie's son, James. He seemed to really like it and I was happy because it was the first time he had ever spoken to me or even payed me much attention. I ended up glad I had come because as it turned out, as we were leaving, I had gone down the steps and James was right behind me. I was watching him and noticed he was about to jump down to the next step. This didn't work out so well for him and he tumbled forward. I lunged forward to catch him but the way he landed I was certain I had failed to catch him. To my relief I had caught him well enough that he came out of it without a scratch and he didn't cry one bit so I knew he wasn't hurt. He did seem shocked though. When my mom asked him if it was fun, he said yes but me, Stephanie and my mom thought otherwise.

We chatted with Stephanie awhile longer then headed on home. I was so tired when I got home. I only chatted with my mom for a little while before I had to relinquish my desire to stay up and play the Wii. I said goodnight and headed to bed.

Goodnight all. Hopefully I will feel better tomorrow.

Wah

Today I again watched Bleach on Youtube until my sister got home. I worked very little on my picture but I have made enough progress that I hate the character's eyes a lot less. They're still not great. Soon after my sister got home we decided to suck it up and go play Tales of Symphonia despite knowing it was likely close to the end. The whole thing was torture really because it kept acting like it just might have something else for us to do then it would resolve whatever new issue they brought up. The game did this several times in this conversation so it kept toying with us, taunting us. Sadly, it very well was the end of the game.

Odd really. It was a lot shorter than the first and there were no optional side-dungeons aside from the lame, short, Katz quests. There really was alot more they could have added to the game just based on ideas that were discussed in the last moments of the game. Seems the producers were just too lazy to try to make this game as good as the first. I did enjoy it, the plot kept me in suspense and confusion the entire time we were playing it. I liked that a lot, but I do wish it had been longer. Either way, I will still very much enjoy it for a long time to come. I still have a run through with my mom and I can play through it by myself as well and can do that as many times as I wish as I had done with the first. I do hope my mom will play it with me someday. Perhaps once we are done with Nancy Drew she would like to play it. Up till now, I've completely forgotten about Spirit Tracks. I do wish to get to playing that some more, but I think I'd rather play Symphonia with my mom first. Of course, I would like to finish the current game we are working on first so we don't have too many games started at one time.

After the credits ended and we watched the final scene of the game, Leighanna and I looked for something else to do and thought about Mario Kart Wii that we still have of Eli's. We played that a good bit knowing we'd return his games on Saturday since we've had the games for a few weeks already. He said we could keep them as long as we needed to but that doesn't mean we can keep them too long. At least I don't like keeping someone's games too long despite how long they say I can play them before returning them.

My mom wanted to watch the show Medium she had recorded on VHS so Leighanna and I got off the game so she could do so. I had given her permission to watch in my room, but my TV's VCR is lame and was mean to her so she couldn't watch back there. I honestly was pretty glad to get off the Wii to let my mom watch. I was enjoying Mario Kart but I was really kinda wanting to go back to my room and do some things on my own for awhile so it worked to both our benefit although I ended up coming back and watching the show with her as I enjoy it as well.

I feel really bad though. Ever since I got the Wii I've spent less and less time with my mom and I haven't been a very big help to her. I believe I am starting to border on being a burden to her. I also feel bad because I learned I had unintentionally hurt my mom's feelings by something I had said in some of my blog posts. Nothing I had posted did I ever mean to be any sort of an insult to her but I suppose it is obvious I did not choose the correct words to better express what I meant and for that I am sorry, even though she is no longer reading my blog posts. If she does read this one, I certainly hope I have not written anything in such a way that it could make her feel bad as I am not angry, irritated, or anything else of the sort with her and I do not want her to feel the way she did last night or worse.

My mom went to bed shortly after watching Medium. At least, that's what I remember. I watched Bleach some more then switched to playing Bleach: Shattered Blade while chatting with Tyler on the phone. All I accomplished was completing two or three characters on Arcade mode and also unlocked Gin Ichimaru as a playable character.

That's all for today. Cya!

Yay For Youtube

Heh. Despite this being one of my "long days" it seemed pretty short. That was likely due to the fact I decided to start watching Bleach again on Youtube. I remembered I had stopped around episode 95 when I was unable to find the next ones dubbed in English but instead of trying to find those episodes, I decided to skip them to episode 100 and luckily this is where I started finding them in English again so lucky for me, I get to continue watching while missing only a few episodes that I didn't care too much about as they were part of the bount arc which was boring me to tears anyway. I was also fortunate in the fact the bount arc had few episodes more before moving on to the Arrancar arc which is what I was REALLY wanting to see. Honestly, I just wanted anything but the bount arc but the Arrancar arc sure makes me happy. I've been relatively obsessed with the Arrancar ever since unlocking an Arrancar named Arturo Plateado on my Bleach: Shattered Blade game.

Because I was watching Bleach on Youtube I made only very small progress on my character I'm been drawing but I am getting there. Really I don't have much but the little details left and then anything big I end up deciding I dislike and need to change. I did also play my Bleach game on my Wii a few times randomly between some episodes just cause watching made me want to play, but then playing the game made me want to watch.

At 8 I started working on supper, I made Shrimp Scampi again. I've done this recipe so many times now I don't even need my cookbook anymore as I have memorized the recipe. Although it's really not all that long or hard to do. After, I sat around in my mom's room and chatted with her. I even showed her the pic I've been working on. Unfortunately I cannot even remember if she told me what she thought about it. No big deal though I suppose.

I know it's not much but that's all I really have to say. Night!

Doodles

Today, as soon as I woke up I was almost immediately set on working on a character I came up with yesterday. The character is for an anime show called "Bleach". I didn't bother at all with the Wii during the time before my sister got home as I wanted as much time possible to work on this pic which is only a headshot of the character. I've gotten significant progress my only real issue is her eyes and indecisiveness on the hair. As soon as I get this headshot done I plan to draw a full body pic of her and eventually piece together a reference sheet. I'm really happy with how it's coming along, especially considering how I usually don't do so well drawing human-like beings.

I'm glad I didn't start up the Wii a little before my sister got home as I tend to do sometimes. Reason for this is that she came home and told me she had some things to do before going to spend some time with her friend. This actually made me pretty happy as it meant I had more time to work on my picture. Or so I thought. My mom came home shortly after she left so I ran out to help her, upon doing so I realized she brought home pizza for supper. I never suspected it for a moment, so it was a really nice surprise. Right after eating, my mom mentioned playing the video game with me since my sister was going to be with her friend till later. I had no complaints with that as I can work on my drawing all day tomorrow, whereas, I can only play with my mom on occasion when she feels up to it or has time. I kept wanting to show her the drawing I was working on but for some reason I felt like I shouldn't so I never asked if she cared to see it.

We played for only a short while as my mom wanted to be off before my sister got home although she really didn't have to. She's gotten barely any time on the Wii, not to mention my sis didn't even want to play because of how late she came home. But it's okay. Because she didn't want to play, my sis and I ended up watching America's Funniest Videos. After I returned to my room to work on m pic some more. I can't even leave it alone long enough to finish my post. Every time I turn around I find myself working on it again and my post still unfinished. Think I'll be heading to bed soon so I will work on it more tomorrow. I'll have lots of time to work on it then.

Night!

Some Things Never Go As Planned

Well as I mentioned yesterday, I really did not end up playing the Wii or fall asleep watching a movie. I never figured I would really but I thought about it. By the time I got to that point I was too tired to care.

Today instead of carting my Wii to the living room I hooked it up in my room to play. Of course I did this after doing a few things on my comp but yeah. I got it hooked up and played Naruto first. I started to play the survival mode with Kabuto but I noticed something different from usual. The color was A LOT more vivid and rich. I noted several things I thought were pink were actually red and some things I saw as blue were a bluish-purple. I realized the color on the TV in the living room must have been altered and I came to the conclusion it was because of Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess as that game is always too dark to see on normal settings.

I was very uncomfortable playing Naruto while sitting down but considering the height level of the TV I had little choice without relocating it which I had no intention of doing. I continued on like this, getting myself a 55 win streak with Kabuto on Survival mode. Not much of a hurray considering his ability but fun nonetheless. I was bored of that halfway through so when I finally got killed I was pretty relieved and switched to Bleach.

This game I was able to play laying down, which made me happy as I wasn't feeling too great at the time and laying on my stomach made me feel better. During this time my mom kept texting me and even called me once. The really odd thing is she somehow manages to text or call right when I start playing, or during a time I cannot pause such as during story line I'm trying to listen to. She's not doing it on purpose as she wasn't even home. I just find it odd. The first time today was during the ending of Kenpachi's episode in which she called me so I had to answer but I tried to make sure to listen to her as well as pay attention to the game since it wasn't waiting for me. The other times she texted me, but the odd thing about that was I had stopped playing Bleach for about an hour and she did not text me at all during that time, but as soon as I started playing again she texted me. Today is not the only day this has happened either. It happens pretty consistently. I wonder how that ends up happening. Mysterious.

I only played on Episode mode and completed Kenpachi's chapter which unlocked Yoruichi's chapter. I decided to go ahead and get hers done. I would have stopped after her except completing her chapter unlocked Artuo Plateado's chapter. I was WAY to excited about that to turn off the game without playing him. I've developed major fan-ship of him recently so this just made me VERY happy.

When I finished that I turned it off and rested on my bed awhile. It was then a custom Bleach character kinda floated into my mind so after thinking about it awhile, I got up and started to draw her. I did this mostly to get a rough sketch out before my sister got home so I would not forget the important details while we played the game. My sis chatted with me a bit while I finished up on my sketch and we quickly set up the Wii in the living room.

I told my sister, whom knows nothing of Bleach aside from a few things, about Arturo Plateado and how funny this one thing he says after one of his attacks is. She found it hilarious so I showed her on the game though she seemed less than entertained by it at that point. Ah well, that's fine. We didn't play much Symphonia after that. We only played on the Katz quests and I kept having to get up to do something or help my mom with supper.

We fried catfish nuggets for supper in the deep fryer. It was REALLY good. We had leftovers so I will be having that again for lunch tomorrow. Right after supper we sat down to play again but realized House would be on so we went off to watch that then returned only to play a few more quests before quitting for the night. I really didn't mind stopping 30min early as I was kinda eager to work on my Arrancar character I had been working on earlier in the day.

I am very glad tonight that I do not feel too tired to be writing this. I enjoy writing in my blog but I dislike doing so when I feel so tired and just want to go to sleep. Well that's all I know. Night all!